How rude can you be in French?

Being French, I love to hear about how rude we are!

KIDDING.

We’re not that rude. Sure, we do have a few swear words, but certainly not as many as brits do. So, I thought it’ll be interesting to test your knowledge of French swear words and rude slang.

Let’s get to the rules. In order to receive the César of rudeness, you need to know 7 out of the 9 following words. Ready? Set. Go!

 

Try to identify the word in each of the videos 😉 Oh, and if you are easily offended, I suggest you go back in time and don’t click on the title of this blog post. I am going to use curse words in English too, as I have to explain it all. 

1 - Merde

Why should we pass as rude when many languages use this word regularly ? Shit, Merda, Scheiße,…

What can I say, we are, after all, poetic creatures.

It’s not really insulting, just if you want to express how good, or bad something was it’s a good word to know.

Here are a few sentences with it:

Tu ne dis que de la merde
You're full of shit
Merde ! J'ai fait tomber mon téléphone dans les chiottes !!
Damn it ! My phone fell in the toilets !!
C'est vrai ? Bah merde alors !
Is it true? Wow!

2 - Putain

This is probably the most used French swear word. And it is so versatile, that it reminds me very much of the English F word. Except we don’t say ‘le mot en p’. That would just be weird.

You can use it within phrases, or on its own. You can also form a WHOLE sentence just with the word.

A word to know if you are reaching for fluency then!

Putain can be offensive to some people. Avoid saying it in front of children. Especially the one that tend to learn fast 😉

To understand putain fully : hop on to YouTube and watch this wonderful video.

PUTAIN !
FUCK!
Putain, j'ai encore perdu mes clés.
Fuck it, I've lost my keys again.
T'es q'un putain de connard.
You're a fucking bastard.

3 - Bordel

To stay in the theme. Yes, a bordel is a brothel.

We use it quite often. It is not as rude as putain, but it’s still not ok to say if your grandma can hear you (unless your grandmother is unconventional).

You can use it to replace merde or putain, and it has an extra meaning: messy.

No need for a thesaurus then! It’s everything on its own.

C'est un vrai bordel ici.
It's chaos here.
Mais qu'est ce que tu fais bordel ?!
What the fuck are you doing?
Dégages bordel !
Go away!

4 - Fais chier

We like to diversify our swearing vocabulary. When it’s not about sex, it’s about poo. No, I don’t see why we are rude.

Fais Chier, literally means ‘it makes me shit’. It can be conjugated (check the sentences).

It becomes very offensive if you say it directly at someone. But can be said pretty casually amongst friends.

Tu me fais chier !
You're a pain in the ass.
Ah merde, fais chier. J'ai oublié d'acheter du lait pour les crêpes.
Damn it. I've forgotten to buy milk for the pancakes.
Vous me faites tous chier de toute façon.
You're all pissing me off anyway!

5 - Connard / Connasse

Oh we’re getting into the words to actually insult someone now. This is particularly interesting because the same word in its masculine and feminine gender has a slightly different meaning.

A connard is someone stupid, of very low intelligence. It’s a personal favourite of mine when it comes to other drivers.

A connasse is a women of low intelligence. And it can also be a prostitute of ‘low rank’. The masculine term doesn’t convey the prostitute meaning at all. Which reminds me of another interesting video.

Bref, passons.

Les connards de Paris qui débarquent en campagne.
Jerks from Paris on holidays in the countryside.
Espèce de connard !
You bastard!
Hey ! Tu vois pas que le feu est vert, connasse ?
Oy! Don't you see the light's green, bitch?

6 - Salop / Salope

You can sometimes find it written salaud, even though you probably will hear it more than you will write it.

It means someone who is dirty, immoral. And, obviously, the feminine version also means prostitute. Can’t be rude if it’s not somehow sexual.

Be careful, it is different from the connard / connasse. A salaud can be intelligent, a connard isn’t. To me, it is ruder than connard / connasse, but I guess it is probably not a written rule.

Va voir ta salope.
Go to your bitch!
Mais quel salaud celui là !
What a jerk!

7 - Pauvre con / Pauvre conne

This video gives you a glance at why French people are so bad at English. Btw, John Malkovich actually speaks French better than this.

We are not talking about finances here. Like in English, the word pauvre also means (of little) poor quality, poor skills,…

Un pauvre con or une pauvre conne, is a very sad, low stupid person. It does convey the same meaning as connard or connasse, but in, maybe, a less rude way, more pathetic.

Mais t'a rien compris ma pauvre conne !
You didn't get it, did you stupid ?
Pauvre con va !
You dumb!

8 - Ta gueule

“Quoi ma gueule ? Qu’est ce qu’elle a ma gueule ?” – RIP Johnny

I had to. #sorrynotsorry

Bref, a gueule is a face. And we actually use it outside of this expression : gueule de loup, gueules cassées,…

But mostly, we use as ‘ta gueule’, a quite not so polite way to say ‘be silent’. I guess it is the equivalent to the English ‘shut up’.

Mais ta gueule putain !
Are you going to shut the fuck up?
Ta gueule connard !
Shut up jerk !
Ta gueule toi !
Shut up you!

9 - Rien à foutre

Guess what? We’re back at it: sex.

The charming ‘foutre’ might be coming from latin, but it means ‘to have sex in a vulgar way’.

So what does ‘nothing to have sex with in a vulgar way’ could possibly means? Well, it means ‘I don’t care’.

I warned you. If it’s not about sex, we’re not interested.

Rien à foutre de lui.
I don't give a damn about him.
J'en ai rien à foutre de tes conneries.
I don't give a damn about your shit.
Rien à foutre, je vais lui parler.
I don't care, I'll talk to him.

Bonus points

You get two bonus point if you can combine French curse words.

If those words are maybe not as flexible as the F word, you can combine them to express a variety of different things. Just be creative.

Don’t think you’ll ever use those words ? You wouldn’t be able to understand this scene if you didn’t.

Would you rather be polite? Read this.

You’re welcome.

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